School me on Schedules

Mamas, I need help! After another day of variable napping and a horrid time getting Finn to bed, Sean and I are left feeling like we are doing something wrong. When Finn was very young, I took the "on demand" philosophy very seriously and I just tried to feed Finn when he seemed hungry and let him sleep when he seemed tired. Well, at almost eight months, I think this way of going about things is leaving us with no regularity and is actually working against us. We would very much like to ease him into a schedule. We have tried previously, but it always seems like it never works. I don't want to be inflexible, but I think we need more specific eating, napping and bed times. So, what are your thoughts on this? Are schedules too rigid or are you pro-schedule and why? How did you go about getting your loved one on a schedule? How did you even determine what the schedule should be? I am seriously at a loss. We were trying to put Finn to bed at 7:30, but then that seemed too late because he was getting crazy fussy, so we gradually moved it up to 6:30, but then there are some nights he doesn't seem tired at all and we can't get him to bed until 10! If you are trying to put them down, but they fight and fight, do you give in and let them stay up longer or do you stay the course? Naps for Finn are so variable it is unbelievable. Some days he will seem to need a nap every 2 1/2 hours, other days he will stay up 4+ hours before I can get him to sleep and the times are all over the place. How did you determine when nap times should be? For eating do you have set nursing times and set meal times? Or do you nurse whenever, but just schedule meal times? Any help all of you can give me would be awesome. I know every baby and family is different, but Sean and I are at a loss right now and would love to hear some real stories of what you find works. Please comment in the blog or email me! THANKS!